Latest Forum Posts:

Categories

Story tag results for funny

Found 63 result(s)

Gillian and the Three Mole Stories

- Mole Story One I can't recall when I first realized I had a mole under my arm. It was located in the center of my armpit. Early grade school is my best guess. For the most part, I was blissfully una...

By: gillianleeza | Category: Memoirs | Score: 5| Added: 06 Jul 2017

Cat Confessions

- Hello, hoomans of the interwebz, my name is Rudolph Valentino, but I just get called Tino for short. Other names of mine are little shit or Turd-meister because instead of doing my business outside i...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Humor | Score: 4.9| Added: 05 Jul 2017

Canada Food

- "My Uncle Patrick is in Canada," one young boy announced to me on Friday. I was on outside duty that afternoon and it was rather quiet, so I was standing on one of the boxes that the kids can climb u...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 26 May 2017

Thanks, boobies!

- I don't know if it's the children I work with or just children in general, but some of them are obsessed with the human anatomy. Whether it's the questions I have documented in my other stories, or p...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 4.9| Added: 05 May 2017

Boom!

- "Boom!," I hear a little voice coming from the bathroom. "BOOM!" I hear again, this time louder, and then there is the unmistakable sound of laughter. Children just love playing in the bathroom, runn...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 01 Mar 2017

The Mum Goes Moo

- Sitting down with a group of children in the shade, on a very hot day, I was reading a story with them about farm animals. After the story was finished we played the "what sound does this animal make...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 08 Feb 2017

Open Letters - 2

- Back by popular demand! Here are some more general open letters from my life, for you, my internet friends. Dear Hanukkah food- You are so delicious and so tasty. I'm not even 'properly' Jewish but ...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Humor | Score: 4.6| Added: 18 Jan 2017

Chest Lumps and other body oddities

- Children are very curious and inquisitive, so naturally, questions about bodies and body parts are going to come up in my job. How one handles it, is key. Of course, there is that classic childhood ga...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 21 Dec 2016

Captian Scrotum and the SS thrust: Chapter 17 (last chapter)

- Chapter 17 Not Alone Scrotum was sitting on the floor, in a little pain, having shoulder banged the door, without success. “Lilly, can Anna remove the Magnetic device and open the door?” “I’m afraid...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 03 Dec 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust: chapter 16

- Chapter 16 The final scream of the Mia. Roberto smiled as he looked at the screen, his A.I. AR-K0N-X3 had infiltrated the L1’s program, as he knew it would, his Arkon was far superior, stolen from a ...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 25 Nov 2016

How would you like your bear meat?

- One of the funniest, yet simplest things I have ever seen since working with children happened on Thursday and even now, just thinking and writing about it, I have the giggles again. We have a 'family...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 20 Nov 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS thrust: chapter 15

- Chapter 15 Aboard The Thrust. Scrotum was sitting on the toilet hiding, He knew Knob was on his ship, and Lilly was trying to get him off. “Why don’t you just leave the ship, big Knob,” Lilly sugges...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 16 Nov 2016

The Queens Ladybugs

- Ladybugs flying about Chasing the queen butterfly Giggles pours from their mouth While soaring through the sky Dodging the colonel dragonfly Seeing him storming around He likes order in his house No...

By: ChickaDee | Category: Poetry | Added: 14 Nov 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS thrust, chapter 14

- Chapter 14 The Return Of The Knob Scrotum rolled over, his hand landing on something squishy. He squeezed it. He knew a nipple when he felt one. He squeezed it again as he opened his eyes, smiling, a...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 09 Nov 2016

Summer time at the daycare

- Things are heating up at work. Apparently, spring didn't get the memo that it's her season, and us here in Hawkes Bay have gone straight to summer. It's not a major complaint, though, six months of su...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 06 Nov 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS thrust: chapter 13

- Chapter 13 Guess Who’s Back. Marvin had docked his cloaked ship and teleported into the engine room of the Screaming Mia, killing everyone who was there. Then he plugged a device into the Ship's comp...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 31 Oct 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust: Chapter 11 and 12

- Reader discretion advised. The story you are about to read contains mature content that some may find offensive. By choosing to read this piece, you agree that you are 18 or older and do not objec...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 23 Oct 2016

It's a Snake!!!

- Our horse herd was managed in three parts. We kept two small bunches in near pastures for riding, while a third bunch was allowed to roam the far pastures and was brought in only when we needed extra ...

By: Vern_Fawcett | Category: Flash Fiction | Score: 5| Added: 18 Oct 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust: Chapter 10

- Chapter 10. No one can hear you moan in space Lilly instructed Sweet-Cheeks on how to use the Sealant gun “The sealant hardens to a non-conductive solid substance it will fill the hole and protect th...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 09 Oct 2016

Kids say and do the darndest things!

- I work in childcare, a job I love and enjoy very much. No two days are the same and the children definitely keep me on my toes, but I would not change it for the world. I love my job. As you probably ...

By: LauraDanielle | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 05 Oct 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust: Chapter 9

- Chapter 9 Turn Lilly on Marvin looked on in astonishment. No sane person would take cover in an asteroid field, and if the Whorea died, he wouldn’t get paid. He should have kept one prisoner and kill...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 26 Sep 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS thrust: Chapter 8

- Chapter 8 Asto-Annoyed Scrotum was screaming and wheezing, he had dropped his inhaler and was trying to avoid hundreds of rocks. Lilly swung the ship to the left pitched it slightly and looped over a...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 14 Sep 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust, chapter 7

- Chapter 7 a simple repair done badly. Scrotum looked out of the window to the airlock. He knew there were many ways to die out there in the cold vacuum of space. He couldn’t understand why the engine...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 05 Sep 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS thrust chapter sex ... er six

- Chapter sex, er, six. The Hunter General Knob limped out of the lower shuttle and storage area. He was looking for the owner of the station, intending to get information on this Captain Scrot and the...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 4.9| Added: 22 Aug 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust: chapter 5

- Reader discretion advised. The story you are about to read contains mature content that some may find offensive. By choosing to read this piece, you agree that you are 18 or older and do not object ...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 14 Aug 2016

Captian Scrotum and the SS thrust, chapter 4

- Reader discretion advised. The story you are about to read contains mature content that some may find offensive. By choosing to read this piece, you agree that you are 18 or older and do not object ...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 06 Aug 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust chapter 3

- Reader discretion advised. The story you are about to read contains mature content that some may find offensive. By choosing to read this piece, you agree that you are 18 or older and do not object ...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 28 Jul 2016

Captain Scrotum And The SS Thrust chapter 2

- Chapter 2 Hide the body. “Lilly!" Scrotum shouted while panicking, “How long will it take the cleaning bot to clean this mess up?” “I’m sorry sexy ass. I am not programmed to move dead bodies.” Scr...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 22 Jul 2016

Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust

- Captain Scrotum and the SS Thrust The year is 2462, and the earth is dead. What was left of its population spread through the heavens looking for a new home. Of course, once they left earth they foun...

By: rbo | Category: Humor | Score: 4.8| Added: 11 Jul 2016

Zander....the continuing Saga!

- “ Zander.....the continuing Saga!” Well, it's been over a month since we adopted Zander, a very interesting month if I may say so.....and I do! So I'm thinking you need an update on his progress. Dur...

By: Kari | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 10 Jul 2016

A Little Gift from Hades!

- Alexander aka Zander Week One It was the beginning of June, actually June 6th when he came into our life. I was in the office going over my email when Ed entered the house and announced, “There'...

By: Kari | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 25 Jun 2016

Silly Little Butterflies

- Butterflies fluttering deep within They seem to be high Smoking on loves sweetness Making my heart sigh Silly little wings tickle Making me smile How can such creatures Make me sing out I love yo...

By: ChickaDee | Category: Poetry | Added: 25 Apr 2016

Shooting Blanks

- Shooting Blanks By Ray Bentley I started to really doubt myself that morning when I went about the task of shaving. No, I’m not talking about your normal morning shave. The pre-surgery instructio...

By: FiveCount | Category: Humor | Score: 4.4| Added: 02 Feb 2016

Waiting

- How long is enough? As I sit here waiting The clock on the wall Saying tick tock, tick tock My fingers tapping in rhythm Tap, tap, tap Waiting, waiting, waiting When will it stop? The faucet starts...

By: girlie4280 | Category: Poetry | Score: 5| Added: 08 Jul 2015

The Humble Cucumber

- Can anybody tell me just what is so special about cucumber sandwiches? You know those dainty, crustless smelly little things you sometimes get at parties? I loathe cucumbers. I loathe brussel sprouts ...

By: Sparkle | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 22 Jun 2015

I want you so bad

- I see you, my mouth goes dry. It's wrong I know, you belong to another. I can't help myself, I need you. I take you into my room and lay you on the bed.  I hover over you, as I lick my lips.  ...

By: Blood_Black_Rose | Category: Poetry | Score: 5| Added: 16 Mar 2015

Jaffa Cakes and Other Silliness

- Imagine how funny it would be if a woman called Jaffa, married a man with the surname Cake. I have a problem with that. Not because it might be misconstrued as racist, because that’s just stupid. ...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Musings | Score: 5| Added: 20 Dec 2014

A Poem About a Song About A Thong and a Bong

- I’m gonna smoke a bong, wearing a thong, then sing a song. Thong Bong Song, it shall be named, and after that, I shall be blamed for corrupting youth, but we all know the truth. They can’t be tamed...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Poetry | Score: 4.6| Added: 20 Sep 2014

Donut Adventure

- *Warning - This is not a complete story and there will be no conclusion posted on this website.* The famous and world-renowned scientist, C. Nile, has been making breakthroughs in the field of sc...

By: Plasmarift | Category: Humor | Score: 4.5| Added: 12 Jul 2014

Plectrum Spectrum

- I’m not a fan of plectra. I don’t find them all that electra. Or spectaculah. But this one, a jazzy wee plum, fit right between my finger and thumb. It made a noise, oh boy, oh boys! What a lovely n...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Poetry | Score: 5| Added: 20 May 2014

Story of the Phonetic Alphabet and how it came to be…

- Story of the Phonetic Alphabet and how it came to be… “I am the Alpha male!” shouted John as he waved his putter above his head, “ Bravo ” said… Charlie ironically, “If that is ...

By: TheWordWeaver | Category: Musings | Score: 3.7| Added: 14 Apr 2014

Big Bubba

- Big Bubba By James Gersbeck It finally reached about noon when I had enough of the day’s boredom, and decided to call Phil up. My house was desolate anyway and I needed to either get out or do ...

By: DeadHeadJim420 | Category: Young Adult | Score: 4| Added: 06 Mar 2014

Hey, Wanna Win a Prize?

- Hello Kitty hair bobbles, a torch, an arm thingy with a magnifier on it, sticks o’ RAM, rose quartz (raw and unpolished), solder, an amplifier module, various wires and a clock. That is what lies upon...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Musings | Score: 4.8| Added: 15 Jan 2014

One For The Circus

- One For A Friend In distant places, I've come to know That where I go, I mix things up - living in spaces. Fighting within, I began to stare Watching from the side-walk at the circus I glare. The...

By: burnt7 | Category: Musings | Score: 4.8| Added: 18 Aug 2013

My Inspiration...

- Is this a poem? I often wonder. Related statements, on one line and another, does that, fundamentally, a poem make? I take my time, I think of a rhyme I post it here and drink a beer. It rhymes, i...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Poetry | Score: 4.8| Added: 02 Aug 2013

Breakfast in the Village

- Breakfast in the Village It's another lovely day in the Village. Birds are singing and butterflies are floating. Waking I get this notion to fix breakfast for my love. Bouncing down my stairs,...

By: fuzzy1954 | Category: Musings | Score: 4.9| Added: 25 Jul 2013

An Untitled Musing

- So, I’ve got thousands of chats going, some music needs to be slung on and you know what? I’m happy. For the first time in ages, I’m happy. I don’t know if it’s because it was a good day today, or if ...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Musings | Score: 4.6| Added: 19 Jul 2013

Funny Until...

- He should've been at home. That's what he told her. Just a few minutes ago. He knew exactly what she meant. She knew it too. After all, it was in his own best interest. If any one of the city of...

By: burnt7 | Category: Micro Fiction | Score: 4.9| Added: 16 Jul 2013

Stuff

- Something strange happened... Some time this week. Time has bled so much, I can’t tell what day it is, or what I’m doing much, apart from a peach fuzzy sort of fuzz. Buzz. Probably the lack of sleepin...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Musings | Score: 4.3| Added: 19 Jun 2013

Perilous Socks

- Perilous Socks Do you want me to buy you, girly-girl socks? For if I'm not careful, I'll start to buy frocks. Not that it matters or is of alarm, because guys in dresses don’t do any harm. ...

By: bri54 | Category: Poetry | Score: 3.3| Added: 13 May 2013

Scrabble Champ

- Scrabble Champ I want to be, a Scrabble Champ, I want to pass the test. But words like 'it,' with 'and' or 'dog,' will never beat the best. Obscurity in wordiary, that seems the way to be, ...

By: bri54 | Category: Poetry | Score: 5| Added: 04 May 2013

Coal-Miner

- Coal-Miner Thirty year old powerloader Brian, stood amidst the crowd of jabbering miners as they waited to descend in the cage. His aching slightly overweight frame already fatigued with the str...

By: bri54 | Category: Memoirs | Score: 5| Added: 18 Apr 2013

A Random Rambling

- I hate those times when you want to write something, but either have no drive, or no ideas. You open a word document and just type for the sake of typing. Or if you’re a fan of pen and paper, you do i...

By: Circle_Something | Category: Musings | Score: 4.3| Added: 13 Mar 2013

The Least Bowl Game

- 'Tis the season to be jolly, and, here in the U.S., watch football games, especially college bowl games. Every year more of them appear on our screens. With the media talent pool stretched thin, two...

By: Rumple_deWriter | Category: Humor | Score: 5| Added: 01 Dec 2012

Kick the Kan

- Kick the Kan time away from school lazy afternoon with your mates spot running barking at that fool can on the ground spinning one two three can play cool kicking laughing pushing all showing ...

By: fuzzy1954 | Category: Poetry | Score: 4.4| Added: 25 Oct 2012

How To Be A Master Criminal

- The annals of fiction are full of master criminals and evil geniuses. From Sherlock Holmes’ Professor Moriarty to James Bond’s Doctor No, to Superman’s Lex Luthor, each dashing hero must have a worthy...

By: gurmeetmattu | Category: Humor | Score: 4.6| Added: 30 Sep 2012

Hunters Being Hunted

- As you probably know by now, I am an animal lover. Therefore hunters and I don't really get along well. The area we live in has been popular with hunters for who knows how long. The reason being, that...

By: Kari | Category: Drama | Score: 4.9| Added: 14 Sep 2012

The King of Bananas

- Resplendent at his bamboo, yellow banana stall, the King of Bananas prepared for another day's business. His pitch, on the corner of Colombo's Duplication Road and Malasekera Mawatha had become a...

By: andyscribe | Category: Humor | Score: 3.7| Added: 10 Jul 2012

The Erotica Troll

- Kandikizz51 is a writer and many of her poems and stories can be read online on various websites. Some of them can be read here on Erotica. Like many of the writers here, she has been pestered by a tr...

By: kandikiss51 | Category: Humor | Score: 3.8| Added: 31 Jan 2012

I know why

- I know why Late in life Our eyesight Is poor. When we enter the bedroom and close the door. We do not see our life’s love body evermore.

By: courage2bfree | Category: Poetry | Score: 4.5| Added: 24 Nov 2011

my pumpkin pie

- Rushing, rushing With some trusting Ingredients to cook. Looking slowly at my book. I am a spells caster Ever eager And a believer In magic That is classic; To improve the ...

By: courage2bfree | Category: Poetry | Score: 4.4| Added: 31 Oct 2011

What Lady Caught

- Lady was not a very clever cat. She was getting a little old, she had lost a few teeth and she dribbled a bit. She often forgot things like what she was doing or where she was going. She lived with an...

By: MissAdventure | Category: Flash Fiction | Score: 4.7| Added: 25 Oct 2011

White and Blues

- I start up the computer to see the white and blue I never liked the blue so what do I do? I google far and long to right the blue that's wrong I fiddle with the screen until the red is green N...

By: alexfenris | Category: Poetry | Score: 5| Added: 24 Jul 2011